WARNING: This blog is DEFINITELY PG-13!
We have a weekly supplement that our newspaper puts out to compete with the weekly alternative paper - which it really doesn't compete since a lot people pick up both!
Anyway, the weekly supplement asked their staff what was the best part of Halloween - and some gave some amusing answers.
- Tooth decay.
- Zombies. Or chocolate. Maybe both.
- Scaring the crap out of people as they walk up for candy.
- Hiring dwarves in costumes to harvest candy for me.
- Masks. No one knows it was you who puked on that car.
- Lacing Hershey's Miniatures with arsenic.
So I decided to google "favorite part of Halloween" on the internet to see what would come up. Yes, the paper "the best part of Halloween", but I remembered it wrong and used "favorite part", all right? Fine, I'll google "best part" too! Sheesh!
Anyway, these are the most entertaining things that came up - at least in my opinion! Well, that is until I got bored.
Clara, last night: “Daddy, do you know what the best part of Halloween is?”
“No, Clara, what’s that?"
“The part where the candy goes into your bucket.”
She confirmed that she likes that part even better than the part where you actually eat the candy. I have to say I agree.
You know what the best part of halloween is that you can be someone or something your not. I mean how many times did your parents tell you to be yourself...
What’s your favorite part of Halloween? The crisp air, and enjoying my children (my husband eats all of the candy).
But my favorite part of Halloween is decorating the house with my Norman Rockwell Halloween Plates collection from the Shamilton Mint. All the old favorites are there, looking just as they did on the covers of Saturday Evening Post years ago...
My favorite part of Halloween when I was a kid was when my mother would tie donuts from a string and then blindfold us. Obviously the trick was to try and find the donut and eat it. Sort of "Bobbing for Apples" meets "Pin the Tail on the Donkey".
When I was a kid, my favorite part of Halloween happened after the trick-or-treating. It was fun to don a costume and run through the neighborhood in packs, ringing doorbells, collecting treats, and occasionally playing a prank when nobody answered our ring and the lights were out. But the best part was at the end, when my brother and I got home, tore off our costumes, and dumped our huge cache of candy on the living room floor, his candy on one side and mine on the other of a Maginot line running from the television to the kitchen door. It was the climax of the evening, for now it was time to sort and organize the candy. I spent hours on this. Every year I developed elaborate systems. I would organize by size, shape, brand, and quality. I had a chocolate gradient.
I don't know about you, but in the years before beer pong, the mounds of free candy were the best part of Halloween.
My favorite part of Halloween is not the candy corn, nor the pumpkin carving, nor even the gathering of friends to celebrate such a special holiday. Rather, let us consider the Non-Trads - that autonomous group of students that always sit on the perimeters of classrooms and only speak up when the topics of politics, children, or sex arise. For some reason these creatures, while remaining dormant for most of the semester, choose Halloween to express what they've been holding back all this time.
Wigs are, quite frankly, my favorite part of Halloween. I first indulged in my effort to be a redhead when I went as Magenta from Rocky Horror Picture Showin high school, and subsequently made all the guests at my party that year participate in the Time Warp.
My favorite part of Halloween was dressing up with boyfriend Roy as adults for parties and dances.
My favorite part of Halloween isn’t that it’s the one time a year I allow myself to eat SweetTarts, or looking on MySpace on Nov. 1 to see everyone has changed their profile picture to them having what we are to believe is the best drunken time ever in their Sexy Judge or Slutty Cupcake costume. No, it’s seeing all the pictures of small dogs dressed up in humiliating costumes that their crazy owners post on the internet!
The best part of Halloween parties, in Dan's opinion at least, was the acceptability of indiscriminate flirting that would be gauche under normal circumstances.The best part of Halloween for me is seeing all of the dead people.
He said the best part of Halloween Haunt is "a victim curled in the fetal position on the ground with me lording over them."
What's the best part of Halloween? When all the trick-or-treaters have finally gone home and I can drink alone, in peace.
Without a doubt, the best part of Halloween is the costume. A shocking number of females use Halloween as an excuse to wear as little as humanly possible while still covering up certain body parts. I'm not complaining, I'm just observing. An equally shocking number of males each year are compelled to wear tight and skimpy women's clothing while still covering up certain body parts. I am complaining.
But honestly, haven't we lost sight of the best part of Halloween? By that I mean:
Okay, back to slutty.
Skanky costumes are the best part of Halloween. The skankier the better.
The best part of halloween is how regular chicks get to dress up (and often act as) hookers. I'm not sure how or why and I don't really care. Clean girls acting like dirty girls is AOK with me.
I love Halloween. The leaves are falling, a chill is in the air, and you can smell the wood burning in fireplaces all over the neighborhood. Wonderful!. But the best part of Halloween is lighting a match to that bag full of dog(poop) on Mr. Goldbaum's front porch and ringing the doorbell.
A link to all my Halloween posts.
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