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Friday, October 31, 2008

CULTURE/SOCIETY: A Bunch Of Halloween Tests

These are just what I found to be the more interesting Halloween quizzes at blogthings. - OlderMusicGeek




What Your Cute Monster Says About You



You are a simply happy person. You still view the world with a childlike innocence.

You have an easy going attitude, and you value harmony. You love freely and inspire others to love.



You inner demon is frailty. You are easily beaten down by life.

People think you're cute because you are optimistic. Your outlook on life is charming.






You Are 50% Witch



You've got some pretty witchy stuff going on.

Even if you're not a witch, you've got to admit that you're a little freaky.



You have a strong independent streak - social norms be damned. More power to you.

Luckily, the time when you would have been burned at the stake has passed!






You Are a Werewolf



You are moody and easily provoked.

You are highly loyal and protective of those you love.



While you can be intense at times, you are generally a laid back person.

But if a fight comes your way, you will fight 'til the death if necessary.



You seem normal to most people. No one understands how different you can be.

It's like a switch flips for you sometimes - and then you're a completely different creature.






You Should Be a Ghost



You are seen as shy and introverted. You like to blend in... or disappear.

You see Halloween as the day you can sit back and enjoy what other people are doing.



You don't scare all that easily on Halloween. If anything, you tend to scare people.

You don't try to be scary, but you do tend to lurk around and catch people by surprise.






You Are a Werewolf



You're unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky.

You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you're a total monster.

Very few people can predict if you're going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde.

But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural.



Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature



Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control



You play well with: Vampires






You Are Candy Corn



Your Halloween personality is whimsical, colorful, and creative.

You see Halloween as a time to get your creative juices flowing.



Each year, Halloween can't start soon enough for you.

You tend to go all out for Halloween. You decorate like crazy and always dress up.






What Your Halloween Habits Say About You



You're a friendly person, but not the life of the party. You like making someone else's day - and you'll dress up if you think of a really fun costume.



You definitely think of yourself as someone who has a dark side. And part of having that dark side means not showing it.



Your inner child is stubborn and a bit bossy.



You fear people taking advantage for you. You are always worried about protecting your own interests.



You're prone to be quite emotional and over dramatic. Deep down, you enjoy being scared out of your mind... even if you don't admit it.



You are a traditionalist with most aspects of your life. You like your Halloween costume to be basic, well made, and conventional enough to wear another year.






You Are a Little Scary



You've got a nice edge to you. Use it.

HUMOR: Some Halloween Top 10 Lists

Surfing the net, I found these at possumsal.com. - OlderMusicGeek

Ten Signs You Are Too Old For Halloween
10. You get winded from knocking on the door
9. You have to have someone chew the candy for you
8. You ask for high fiber candy only.
7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.
6. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!" and you're not wearing a mask.
5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and you can't remember the rest.
4. By the end of the night you have a bag full of restraining orders.
3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hair piece.
2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.
1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live.

Why Pumpkins are better than Men
1. Every year you get a brand new crop to choose from.
2. No matter what your mood is, pumpkins are always ready to greet you with a smile.
3. One usually makes a better pie.
4. They are always on the doorstep there waiting for you!
5. If you don't like the way he looks, you just carve up another face.
6. If he starts smelling up your place, you can just throw him out.
7. From the start you know a pumpkin has an empty, mush filled head to begin with.
8. A pumpkin is turned on (lit-up) only when you want him to be.

The Top 10 Houses to AVOID while Trick-or Treating
1. Any house that seems to be imploding into a space-time wormhole.
2. Any house made of food.
3. Any house whose only entrance goes to the basement.
4. Any house where the high tension wires suddenly stop right above it.
5. Any house that has ornamental lawn hyenas.
6. Any house that growls "get out."
7. Any house where the furniture seems to be walking across the living room floor.
8. Any house that looks like a giant pulsating orb floating 3 feet off the
ground.
9. Any house with various and extremely realistic statues in the front yard
of people in odd "running away" poses.
10. Any house that wasn't there only a minute ago...

I already posted this, but fits in, so I'm posting it again! - OMGeek

HUMOR: Bad Halloween Jokes

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately...

Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body

What do you call a ghost's mother and father?
Transparents

What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference to its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi

What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo

What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
Any old girl he can dig up

How do you mend a broken Jack-o-Lantern?
With a pumpkin patch

What did the wicked chicken lay?
Deviled eggs

What happened to the guy who didn't pay his exorcist?
He was repossessed

Where does a werewolf go to college?
At the moon-iversity

Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
Because demons are a ghoul's best friend

Mask Pun

My son-in-law Matt has a great-looking Darth Vader mask. One year at Halloween, a friend asked if he could borrow it. Matt agreed, and on Halloween night, his friend came by to pick it up. Matt was surprised that his friend was dressed in his usual attire of jeans and a flannel shirt, with the addition of a black cowboy hat.

"Where's your costume?" Matt asked.

"This is it," his friend replied.

"Well, what are you supposed to be?" Matt inquired.

His friend answered, "Darth Brooks."

Post On Another Blog

"MUSIC: Songs Of The Day - Halloween Edition (Oct 31): "Time Warp" from Rocky Horror Picture Show And "Science Fiction Double Feature" " on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Entertainment Stuff

Thursday, October 30, 2008

HUMOR: Some Halloween Comics

Here are some comics Ernest T Spoon sent me for Halloween. - OlderMusicGeek







CULTURE/SOCIETY: Origin Of Beggar's Night

Well, tonight in my town - yes, TONIGHT - children are going from home to home in costumes telling jokes in order to get candy. If you want to know why they are going tonight and why they are telling jokes, I've done the courtesy of reprinting an article from last Halloween in our paper. I don't guarantee it's accuracy though! - OlderMusicGeek

Jokes set local Halloween apart
MARY CHALLENDER
REGISTER STAFF WRITER

Detroit has Hell Night.

Carbondale, Ill., used to have Fright Night.

When it comes to bizarre local Halloween traditions, however, few communities can match the (my town) metro area and its 50-year-old ritual of - well, let's just call it Bad Joke Night.

In most places, the Halloween tradition goes like this: The kid says, "Trick-or-treat." The homeowner gives him candy.

In (my town) and surrounding suburbs, it's more like this: The kid says, "Trick or treat." The homeowner says "What's your trick?" Then the kid tells a joke of the sort usually found on Bazooka gum wrappers.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have any guts.

Whether or not the homeowner is amused, the kid gets candy.

There may be children elsewhere in the world who follow this unusual practice, but if so, anthropologist Ken Erickson has never run across them. Erickson directs the Center for Ethnographic Research at the University of Missouri.

"That is totally cool," said Erickson, who has conducted research on Halloween customs in the United States. "I never heard of that before. That is totally fun."

Erickson isn't the only one in the dark. In the 1990 book "Halloween: An American Holiday, an American History," author Lesley Pratt Bannatyne, one of the nation's foremost authorities on the holiday, traced the evolution of Halloween from colonial times through its modern-day commercialism. Although the book contains many references to trick-or-treating practices across the United States, telling riddles never enters the equation.

A mushroom walks into a bar. "You'll have to leave," the bartender says. "We don't allow mushrooms in here." "Why not?" asked the mushroom. "I'm a fungi."

The credit for providing (my town) children with the perfect outlet for their most groan-inducing jokes largely goes to one woman, Kathryn Krieg, director of recreation for the (my town) Playground Commission (later the Parks and Recreation Department) for 43 years.

When Krieg assumed her post in 1931, kids on Beggars' Night were more likely to clamor "Soaps or Eats" than "Trick or Treat." Every year the newspaper ran a long list on Nov. 1 of youths arrested the previous evening for crimes ranging from soaping windows and sidelining streetcars to setting fires and throwing bricks through windows.

The flash point came on Halloween in 1938 when (my town) police answered a record 550 calls concerning vandalism. Krieg, along with the Community Chest' group work council, began a campaign to encourage less violent forms of Halloween fun.

They set aside Oct. 30 as Beggars' Night and got the word out to the public that on that night - and only that night - children would be allowed to go from door to door and say the phrase "tricks for eats." The council urged that "eats should be given only if such a 'trick' as a song, a poem, a stunt or a musical number, either solo or in group participation, is presented."

The next year, the group work council again promoted the Beggars' Night concept, this time as a way to aid the war effort. An article published in (my town newspaper) on Oct. 29, 1942, carried the headline "Kids! -Don't Help the Axis on Halloween" and included this poem encouraging proper behavior:

"Soap and ticktacks are taboo,
Ringing doorbells? Not for you.
Thoughts of pranks, you must detour,
Lest you bet a saboteur."

The Beggars' Night program was so successful that by the mid-1940's, the number of Halloween police calls in (my town) had been cut by more than half.

After the war, Krieg continued to issue annual bulletins in the Register laying still more Beggars' Night ground rules, including that children should stay in their own neighborhoods and that parents should turn on their porch lights for trick-or-treaters and accompany small children on their rounds.

Each year, she reiterated that children should not be given candy until they earned it "with a stunt, song, or riddle."

Now on Beggars' Night, a group of preteen girls will occasionally sing a song or a shy kindergartner opt for a cartwheel. For the most part, however, every trick-or-treater old enough to memorize one tells a joke.

Why did Dracula visit the blood bank?
He needed to make a withdrawal.

Krieg retired in 1974, a few years after the Register stopped running her yearly admonition to make children work for their candy. By then, the biggest Beggars' Night concern wasn't the danger trick-or-treaters might represent to the public but the danger some members of the public might represent to trick-or-treaters. Krieg died in March of 1999 at age 94.

The joke-telling ritual continues, as does its legacy: Reduced vandalism. Instead of tales of marauding youth, the only Halloween-related story to appear in the Register last year was about a gathering of local witches.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims.

I remember when my daughter was 2 and trick-or-treating. She was too young to tell a joke, but since she was dressed as Queen Amidala, I taught her to sing the theme to Star Wars! - OMGeek

Sunday, October 26, 2008

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Happy World Zombie Day!

This is from me, NOT some reprinted piece. - OlderMusicGeek

Well, in case, you haven't heard, today is World Zombie Day. So I just want to wish every a deadly, brain-eating day tomorrow!

Unfortunately, my town isn't participating. Uuuugggghhhhh!!!! (That's suppose to be an angry zombie yowl!)

But included, on my site, are some links to zombie stuff I've done before and a couple of new posts on zombies.

And here's a couple of more zombie songs!





A link to a piece I did on the songs, "Zombies Ate Her Brain" By The Creepshow And "Fashion Zombies" By The Aquabats"
A link to The World Zombie Day MySpace page

SPIRITUALITY/RELIGION: Was Jesus A Zombie?

From the website, Zombie Jesus... - OlderMusicGeek

1) He came back from the dead

Acts 2:24
But God raised him from the dead, freeing him from the agony of death, because it was impossible for death to keep its hold on him

2) He encourages zombie like behavior

John 6:53
Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you"

Excerpts from The Uncyclopedia's article on Zombie Jesus.... - OMGeek

It was as the subtle, burning glances of His onlooking Roman captors, the angry, Jewish rabble, and remorsefully sullen followers became more stricken with terror, fright, and penance that Zombie Jesus returned to this world, forcing his broken, tired limbs, blood-stained from the mortal wounds he had suffered, to pull his undead carcass from the rough hued Cross so that he might seek the most appropriate Earthly sustenance deserved of the sacrificed son of God: a crimson river of Flesh and Brains to satiate his heavenly hunger.

History

After dying, Jesus was raised from the dead and once more walked among the living. This, of course, would only be possible if he were a zombie; Zombie Jesus is the identity of Jesus following the Resurrection. In zombie form, Jesus retained his unending love for mankind, in particular, he loved their sweet, delectable brains. Many of his followers were surprised when, instead of offering God's salvation, Zombie Jesus voraciously consumed their faces.

It is now widely believed today that Jesus was the source breeder of modern-day zombies, since when he resurrected, he infected his disciples with the blood of the new "Holy Alliance", thus founding the basis for whole new era of zombie mayhem, unseen since the infection of elite Greek philosophers by Zombie Plato several centuries before.

Teachings and Acts of Zombie Jesus

Zombie Jesus' words and acts are recorded in one of the apocryphal books (books which were not included in the New Testament by the Catholic Church), the "Book of Brains". The most famous part of the "Book of Brains" is the "Parable of the Brains", in which Zombie Jesus spoke unto the assembled masses: "Braaaiiins.... braaaiiinnnss... braaaaiinss!!" (in the original Greek of the Gospel, "μυαλό.... μυααααλό.... μυααααλό!!!").

Defeating Zombie Jesus

Unlike the common zombie or the common Jesus, Zombie Jesus is notoriously difficult to put down. The garden-variety zombie can be killed by a shovel to the brain, but only the Soviets (and Cthulhu armed with a pair of Sephiroth-chucks) could defeat Zombie Jesus... He was mutated back into the form of a man, which was very short lived for he was quickly killed by a Nazi, because despite being a former Messiah, zombie, and Kraken, he was still a Jew, and Nazis hate Jews..

Vampire Jesus?

The debate over whether Jesus came back as a zombie or a vampire caused yet another schism in the Christian Church, and forming two new Christian denominations: Zombie Christians and Vampire Christians. About half of the population of Vampire Christians claim that they converted because "Vampires are just so much more awesome than zombies". These people were insane, of course. Zombies are far superior.

A link to the Zombie Jesus web site
A link to the Uncyclopedia's article on Zombie Jesus

CULTURE/SOCIETY: ZombieHarmony

This is from me, NOT some reprinted piece. Though most is taken directly from the web site! - OlderMusicGeek

"ZombieHarmony... because the apocalypse doesn't have to be lonely."

I don't remember how I found this website, but find it I did! And what a website it is! I mean zombies need love too!

It even comes with this great disclaimer - Disclaimer: ZombieHarmony is for zombies only. We advise signing up for ZombieHarmony only if you lack a pulse, have limited motor skills, or feel an intense desire to feast on human beings. We are not responsible for lost or ingested loved ones. If you go on a date with a zombie, we cannot be held liable for contributing to the apocalypse. Please date responsibly: bring a baseball bat or crowbar.
I found a date through zombie harmony - one of the best free dating sites for zombies
Created by Mingle2.com (Dating for non-zombies)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Too Many Quizzes Testing One's Evilness


Raw evil score: 17.78%
What Kind of Evil Are You?


How evil are you?





You Are 44% Evil



You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side.

Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination.

How Evil Are You?

YOU ARE SOME WHAT NOT EVIL YOU ARE NOT EVIL AND EVIL SHALL CONQUER THE WORLD SOMEDAY AND DESTROY LIGHT
How evil do you think you are?



Evil QuizAccording to experts, I am :

38% Evil
Take the Evil Quiz at JokesUnlimited.com


You unfortunately do not possess the necessary qualities to be an evil super villain. Please continue with your studies and apply again next year.
EVIL QUIZ

I am 0% evil! Are you an Evil Genius?

You're barely evil at all.

You? evil? Ha. Nobody's perfect, but you're one of the least evil people who've ever taken this quiz. If you're feeling guilty about something, it's probably only because you momentarily stopped petting a kitten to answer those questions. You would never be intentionally cruel to an animal, a friend, or even a stranger. Reading this quiz is probably the closest you've come to having an evil thought. We don't want you focused on evilness any longer than necessary, so please go back to what you do best -- spreading joy and sunshine throughout the land.
How Evil Are You?

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Skeletons In The Closet

I don't know how true this is, but I found it interesting. It's from my work's newsletter. - OlderMusicGeek

Explaining the ‘skeleton in the closet

Hundreds of years ago when English physicians wanted to learn about the human body, it was difficult because there were numerous regulations to follow.

Doctors were typically allowed to dissect only one body over the course of their education, and once the dissection had been accomplished, the physicians were reluctant to give up their prized possessions.

But it wasn’t socially acceptable to keep the skeletons, according to Webb Garrison in his book Why You Say It. Consequently, doctors often hid them in a dark corner or closet where they wouldn’t be discovered easily. Eventually the phrase “skeleton in the closet” came to mean hidden evidence of any kind.

SCIENCE/TECHNOLOGY: Top 10 Ways to Destroy Earth

I heard about this from the podcast/radio show, Paranormal Radio With Captain Jack. It's from Live Science. I thought it was perfect for Halloween!

I edited it down a bit, read the full version here. - OlderMusicGeek

Whether it took the Earth 4.5 billion years to get to where it is today (or a mere seven days), destroying it might take a lot less time. Sam Hughes presents a host of methods for ending the planet -- and life -- as we know it. Enjoy!
- By Sam Hughes

10. Total existence failure


You will need: nothing

Method: No method. Simply sit back and twiddle your thumbs as, completely by chance, all 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 atoms making up the planet Earth suddenly, simultaneously and spontaneously cease to exist. Note: some kind of arcane (read: scientifically laughable) probability-manipulation device would probably have to be employed.

9. Gobbled up by strangelets

You will need: a stable strangelet

Method: Create and maintain a stable strangelet. Keep it stable for as long as it takes to absorb the entire Earth into a mass of strange quarks. Keeping the strangelet stable is incredibly difficult once it has absorbed the stabilizing machinery.

Earth's final resting place: a huge glob of strange matter.

8. Sucked into a microscopic black hole

You will need: A microscopic black hole. Creating a microscopic black hole is tricky, since one needs a reasonable amount of neutronium, but may possibly be achievable by jamming large numbers of atomic nuclei together until they stick.

Method: Simply place your black hole on the surface of the Earth and wait. The black hole will plummet through the ground, eating its way to the center of the Earth and all the way through to the other side: then, it'll oscillate back, over and over like a matter-absorbing pendulum. Eventually it will come to rest at the core, having absorbed enough matter to slow it down. Then you just need to wait, while it sits and consumes matter until the whole Earth is gone.

Earth's final resting place: a singularity of almost zero size.

Source: "The Dark Side Of The Sun," by Terry Pratchett. It is true that the microscopic black hole idea is an age-old science fiction mainstay which predates Pratchett by a long time, he was my original source for the idea, so that's what I'm putting.

7. Blown up by matter/antimatter reaction

You will need: 2,500,000,000,000 tons of antimatter

Antimatter can be manufactured in small quantities using any large particle accelerator, but this will take some considerable time to produce the required amounts. It may be possible - and much easier - simply to "flip" 2.5 trillion tons of matter through a fourth dimension, turning it all to antimatter at once.

Method: This method involves detonating a bomb so big that it blasts the Earth to pieces.

The gravitational binding energy of a planet of mass M and radius R is - if you do the lengthy calculations - given by the formula E=(3/5)GM^2/R. For Earth, that works out to roughly 224,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Joules. The Sun takes nearly a WEEK to output that much energy.

To liberate that much energy requires the complete annihilation of around 25,000,000,000,000 tonnes of antimatter. Once you've generated your antimatter, just launch it towards Earth. The resulting release of energy should be sufficient to split the Earth into a thousand pieces.

Earth's final resting place: A second asteroid belt around the Sun.

Earliest feasible completion date: AD 2500.

6. Destroyed by vacuum energy detonation

You will need: a light bulb

Method: Scientific theories tell us that what we may see as vacuum is only vacuum on average, and actually thriving with vast amounts of particles and antiparticles constantly appearing and then annihilating each other. It also suggests that the volume of space enclosed by a light bulb contains enough vacuum energy to boil every ocean in the world. All you need to do is figure out how to extract this energy and harness it in some kind of power plant - then surreptitiously allow the reaction to run out of control.

Earth's final resting place: a rapidly expanding cloud of particles of varying size.

Earliest feasible completion date: 2060 or so.

Source: "3001: The Final Odyssey," by Arthur C. Clarke

5. Sucked into a giant black hole

You will need: a black hole, extremely powerful rocket engines, and, optionally, a large rocky planetary body.

Method: After locating your black hole, you need get it and the Earth together. There are two methods, moving Earth or moving the black hole, though for best results you'd most likely move both at once.

Earth's final resting place: part of the mass of the black hole.

Earliest feasible completion date: I do not expect the necessary technology to be available until AD 3000.

Sources: "The Hitch Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy," by Douglas Adams; SPACE.com

4. Meticulously and systematically deconstructed

You will need: a powerful mass driver or lots of them; ready access to roughly 2*10^32J

Method: Basically, what we're going to do here is dig up the Earth and boost the whole lot of it into orbit. A mass driver is a sort of oversized electromagnetic railgun - basically, you just load it into the driver and fire it upwards in roughly the right direction. We'd use one big enough to hit escape velocity of 11 kilometers per second even after atmospheric considerations - and launch it all into the Sun or randomly into space.

Earth's final resting place: Many tiny pieces, some dropped into the Sun, the remainder scattered across the rest of the Solar System.

Earliest feasible completion date: Ah. Yes. At a billion tons of mass driven out of the Earth's gravity well per second: 189,000,000 years.

Source: this method arose when Joe Baldwin and I knocked our heads together by accident.

3. Pulverized by impact with blunt instrument


You will need: a big heavy rock, perhaps Mars

Method: Essentially, anything can be destroyed if you hit it hard enough. The concept is simple: find a really big asteroid or planet, accelerate it up to some dazzling speed, and smash it into Earth, preferably head-on but whatever you can manage. The result: an absolutely spectacular collision, resulting in Earth and our "cue ball" being pulverized out of existence.

Earth's final resting place: a variety of roughly Moon-sized chunks of rock, scattered haphazardly across the greater Solar System.

Earliest feasible completion date: AD 2500, maybe?

Source: This method suggested by Andy Kirkpatrick

2. Eaten by von Neumann machines


You will need: a single von Neumann machine

Method: A von Neumann machine is any device that is capable of creating a copy of itself given nothing but the necessary raw materials. Create one of these that subsists almost entirely on iron, magnesium, aluminum and silicon, the major elements found in Earth's mantle and core. As the population of machines doubles repeatedly, the planet Earth will be entirely eaten up and turned into a swarm of potentially sextillions of machines.

Earth's final resting place: the bodies of the VNMs themselves, then a small lump of iron sinking into the Sun.

Earliest feasible completion date: Potentially 2045-2050, or even earlier.

Source: "2010: Odyssey Two," by Arthur C. Clarke

1. Hurled into the Sun

You will need: Earth moving equipment

Method: Hurl the Earth into the Sun. You don't actually have to literally hit the Sun (send the Earth near enough to the Sun (within the Roche limit), and tidal forces will tear it apart).

Earth's final resting place: a small globule of vaporized iron sinking slowly into the heart of the Sun.

Earliest feasible completion date: Via act of God: 25 years' time. Any earlier and we'd have already spotted the asteroid in question. Via human intervention: given the current level of expansion of space technology, 2250 at best.

Source: "Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers," by Grant Naylor

Post On Another Blog

"MUSIC: Song Of The Day - Halloween Edition (Oct 17): "Country Death Song" By The Violent Femmes" on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Entertainment Stuff

Post On Another Blog

"MUSIC: Song Of The Day - Halloween Edition (Oct 16): "Eve Of The War" By Jeff Wayne" on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Entertainment Stuff

Saturday, October 18, 2008

CULTURE/SOCIETY: How To Survive A Horror Movie

I found these on various websites, each claiming the rules as their own! So I have no idea where any of them really came from! - OlderMusicGeek

- When it appears that you have killed the monster, never check to see if it's really dead.
- If you've just pushed the monster/psychopath/axe murderer in the lake from your boat dock or a bridge, don't lean over to see if he's gone!
- Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.
- Do not keep all your sharpened kitchen knives in one of those wooden blocks on your work surface.
- Never back out of one room into another without looking. It's always behind you.
- If you are running away from the killer/monster, don't even try to start the car. It doesn't matter if the car is brand new, it won't start.
- When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off or go it alone.
- Never accept a job as a camp counselor.
- Never say "Who's there?"
- Kill the Scientist. No matter what else you do, kill him off right away. They always want to study "it," or take "it" back to the corporate masters, or learn from "it" at the expense of comrades lives. Eggheads are always trying to understand the unknown, and get nearly everyone killed doing it. Get a clue, kill the guy with the pocket protector, he's going to sacrifice you anyway.
- If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.
- If you are running for your life and are being chased by a monster/psychopath/axe murderer and you happen to be female, take the high-heeled shoes OFF!
- If you are a girl with long blonde hair, blue eyes and big boobs, well, you are pretty much screwed.
- Union rules permit monsters to follow you but they are not permitted to attack until you have turned around to see if they are there.
- When you're searching a house because you think there's something dangerous there, for God's sake turn the lights on!
- If you're searching for something that caused a mysterious noise and find out that it's just the cat, leave the room immediately if you value your life.
- If you find a town that looks deserted, it's probably that way for a reason. Take the hint and stay away.
- Never say that you'll be right back, because you won't.
- If anything other than water (i.e., blood or thick goo of any color) comes out of a faucet, do not call a plumber. Leave the house immediately.
- Do not take *anything* from the dead.
- When finding a meteor/egg sac/fetal creature of any kind, step away! DO NOT give in to the diabolical urge to poke it with a stick.

The #1 rule for surviving a horror movie: DON'T HAVE SEX!!!

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Predictions Of Death

Dan: At age 69, the artificial intelligence software you programmed becomes self aware and devours you. You will be saved to disk though, so no worries.

OlderMusicGeek: At age 92, you will die from wounds delivered by a blender after trying to make your sixteenth margarita of the day. (And it's on 3:00pm, shame on you!)

OlderMusicGeek's daughter: At age 62, your prototype flying machine will work, and while aloft on its maiden voyage a passenger jet will take you into it's jet engine, and throw you out as a mist.

OlderMusicGeek's cat: At age 38, you will be hit by a train while napping on the railroad tracks.

OlderMusicGeek's readers: At age 9, your head will explode after being exposed to Britney Spears for thirty-six consecutive hours!

YOU!: At age 14, aliens will abduct you and use your body for sick and often anally-oriented experiments before dropping you off outside of a local homeless shelter smelling of beer.

For your own prediction - http://evil.berzerker.net/death_predictions.php

SPIRITUALITY/RELIGION: Ghost Quizzes

Will you turn into a ghost when you die?
Or will you race up to heaven? Down to you-know-where? Or will you be gone forever?

This is a hard one, you will either disappear or go right up to heaven. Your goodness shines through, but people who do not believe may not deserve anything. Most certainly you WILL fly up, UP; UP! But be aware, I am NOT sure!
31.95 % of 3246 Quiz participants had this profile!








What type of ghost are you?


You don't even know that you're a ghost. And you were probably a dork when you were alive.
Take this quiz


What type of ghost are you? (Another quiz with the same name)
Your Result
You're a fraidy ghost. You're scared of everything. You're probably scared of this quiz.


Which ghost of the 13 are you?
The Pilgrimess

The Salem Witch Trials was a sad time..you were one of the many girls that were accused of witch craft. The girl from school, who was jealous of you, told the teacher and you were immediately sent to court. No one listened to you speak of her jealousy. No one cared. No tolerance was slapped on you. You were killed the next day, with a mean look on your face. You're now a angry ghost that haunts the town of Salem everyday. You are The Pilgrimess.


What type of ghost are you? (A third quiz with the same name)

Your Result
You are a noisy ghost, you are always screaming and trying to haunt people.

Post On Another Blog

"MUSIC: Song Of The Day - Halloween Edition (Oct 15): "(Don't Fear) The Reaper" By Blue Oyster Cult" on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Entertainment Stuff

Post On Another Blog

"MUSIC: Song Of The Day - Halloween Edition (Oct 14): "Big Lizard" By The Dead Milkmen" on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Entertainment Stuff

Sunday, October 12, 2008

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