My friend, Ernest T Spoon, sent me this via email. He claims to have gotten it from his favorite porn site. Porn site or not, this did tickle my funny bone, though probably more because of my recent divorce. But I still think others will find it humorous.
HAPPINESS
- To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
- To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
- A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
- A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
- A woman has the last word in any argument.
- Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
ABOUT ME
- MY OTHER STUPID STUFF:
Just your typical middle-aged divorced father (of a teenage daughter)/music fanatic/local bands supporter/nerd-geek-dork/smartass/movie lover/tv watcher/book reader/former comicbook collector/science fiction fan/slob/science buff/casual philosopher/spirituality peruser/ponytail wearer/world traveler/big Lipstick Homicide fan/huge Violent Femmes fan/Sigourney Weaver crusher/rabid Journey hater/liberal/mostly straight former cross dresser from Des Moines, Iowa, U.S.A.
If you're looking for more of the same, check out my Twitter page at http://twitter.com/OlderMusicGeek or my Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/oldermusicgeeksstupidstuff and also https://www.facebook.com/pages/Too-Offensive/150216568435564. Or just hit the links below.
If you're looking for more of the same, check out my Twitter page at http://twitter.com/OlderMusicGeek or my Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/oldermusicgeeksstupidstuff and also https://www.facebook.com/pages/Too-Offensive/150216568435564. Or just hit the links below.
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Futurismo Unveils DEVO’s Recombo DNA: Rare Demos & Unreleased Tracks - Spuds rejoice. After years of requests, Futurismo are thrilled to announce a brand new limited pressing of the DEVO’s incredible Recombo DNA 4xLP with Mi...4 weeks ago
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From puppies to seniors, perfect pet parenting - Among the most rewarding and significant obligations you will ever have is pet care. Every stage of a dog’s life calls for careful attention whether you ar...5 weeks ago
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Business Day. - So, I was telling Andrew about how crazy The Blake School (1900) is. I was telling him how my friend and I managed to freak out my friend's girlfriend when...
2 years ago -
سيدتي الجميلة خليكى شباب على طول مع مجموعات النوفادج الخطيرة التواصل واتساب 01204022568 - حقوق الطبع والنشر محفوظة لللمهندس الزراعي ماجد بديع أبوموسي ومن يخالف ذلك يتعرض للمسائلة القانونية والجنائية [[ This is a content summary only. Visit my we...4 years ago
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Taliban Attacks Could Resume - A spokesman for the Taliban has announced its forces may resume attacks in Afghanistan. This comes after the U.S. announced a peace agreement with the grou...4 years ago
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Fuel increase triggers price hikes - [image: 1 Fuel increses (2)] Maseru-Following the increase in petroleum products, particularly petrol and diesel, taxi operators say they would approach ...7 years ago
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Relationship Funerals & The Way We Say Goodbye - One year ago today I wrote the following in response to this piece about Relationship Funerals I share it now with you. A breakup ritual could be incredibl...8 years ago
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This Guy - Remember how I said I was pregnant? Well, I’m not anymore. This is our little peanut: They forced her out 4 weeks early before we were adequately prepared ...8 years ago
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Episode 130---Upping Your Game! - In this episode, Drew Baker, Kieran Yanner, Patrick McEvoy, and Jeremy McHugh discuss a listener question from Frostfyre on upping your game as an artist...
9 years ago -
John June Year - Pop Sucker - John June Year is part of the thriving music scene in Cedar Falls/Waterloo area via Clinton, Iowa. They are a 5 piece band with 2 guitarist, keyboards, bas...
9 years ago -
The New PostSecret Book - See PostSecret videos, discover new PostSecret links, pre-order the new PostSecret book. Visit '*The World of PostSecret*'.
10 years ago -
World War Kaiju - progress report! - Hello there faithful followers. I'll bet you're wondering how World War Kaiju is coming along, and how your host Patrick is doing with the art. Well, ha...
10 years ago -
Lowongan Terbaru HRD SUPERVISOR Jakarta - *The Summit Apartment Kelapa Gading* *Urgently needed:* *HRD SUPERVISOR* *(Generalist)* *Male / Female* *Min. S1 preferably from psychology or Law* *Deep k...11 years ago
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#49 Handshakes - It has been theorized that Men are descended from apelike creatures, and that through a process called evolution Men emerged as a distinct species. Darwin...12 years ago
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#136: My So-Called Life - Though very specific to white people who were going through an awkward phase in 1995 (basically anyone between eleven and forty), My So-Called Life’s reson...14 years ago
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We're never leaving Afghanistan because it's too good for business - If the Wikileaks disclosure of classified documents concerning the mangled mess that is Afghanistan changes any of the granite-minds of centrist Democrats ...14 years ago
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Advanced Reading: I Am Me! - *With Valentine's Day just around the corner, I want you to spend time thinking about yourself and how important you are. You all are a very special part ...
14 years ago -
Avoiding an Awkward Massage - Hello WWRD fans! I've now moved to blogging with my colleague Linda Holmes over at Monkey See. But while you're here you might as well check out the latest...15 years ago
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Scandal! Behind-the-Scenes Strife! Spinal Tap! - » Hear the 'Weekend Edition' story Blind Items: In NPR's internal In Character wars, who said what about whom? And which fictional figure best embodies the...16 years ago
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Starting my business - Now that I am about to face an empty nest I am thinking more and more on the business I have wanted to start for some time now. I kept telling myself I nee...17 years ago
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My Internet Radio Stations
Some Movies I've Seen (Or Reseen) Recently
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The Movies I Want To See The Most, But Haven't Yet
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My Favorite Movies
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