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Showing posts with label cleanliness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cleanliness. Show all posts

Monday, March 04, 2013

SCIENCE/TECHNOLOGY: What Did People Use Before Toilet Paper?

Using the bathroom has come a long way from when ancient Greeks used stones and pieces of clay for personal hygiene. Toilet paper is one of those things that often gets taken for granted in modern times, except for places Charmin has yet to infiltrate. This is definitely one of those unavoidable things in life, so through many centuries and in many cultures, everyone had their own method of staying clean. Be warned: We’re going to get specific.

Read the full text here:
http://mentalfloss.com/article/48950/what-did-people-use-toilet-paper

Thursday, March 06, 2008

HUMOR: Important Computer Maintenance

I got this email from Ernest T Spoon. - OlderMusicGeek

Subject: Important computer maintenance

Often we dust off the cabinet and clean the mouse on our computers. We forget about one of the most important pieces of equipment, the monitor.I have found the neatest program to automatically clean monitors. I used it on mine and it is amazing how it worked! Just click on the link below and watch it work! It's as easy as that!

http://cache.valleywag.com/assets/resources/screenclean.swf

Saturday, November 10, 2007

CULTURE/SOCIETY and HUMOR: In Praise of Older Women

The Formerly Wild Now Christian Co-Worker sent me an email praising women over 40. It was rather schmaltzy piece that Andy Rooney had supposably written. Well, I checked at Snopes.com. It turns out Andy Rooney didn't write it. When asked if he agreed with the piece, he said, "Not particularly." Now THAT sounds like Andy Rooney!

Anyway, the piece of work was actually a schmaltzification of a rather humorous and entertaining piece written by a Frank Kaiser. And I have included most of the original web page below. - OlderMusicGeek.

In Praise of
Older Women
By Frank Kaiser
One of the perks of dufferdom is an increased capacity to appreciate people. Friends. Spouses. And, for me, women. All women.

When I was 20, I had eyes only for girls my age. Any woman over 30 was ancient, over 40 invisible.

Today, at 71, I still appreciate the 20-year-old for her youthful looks, vigor, and (occasional) sweet innocence.

But I equally enjoy women of my own age and beyond, and every age in between. I've learned that each has its own special wonders, attractions, magic and beauty.

As I grow in age, I value mature ladies most of all. Here are just a few of the reasons senior men sing the praises of older women:

  • An older woman knows how to smile with such brightness and truth, old men stagger.

  • An older woman will never ask out of the blue, "What are you thinking?" An older woman doesn't care what you think.

  • An older woman's been around long enough to know who she is, what she wants, and from whom. By the age of 50, few women are wishy-washy. About anything. Thank God!

  • And yes, once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart!

      Her libido's stronger.

      Her fear of pregnancy's gone.

      Her appreciation of experienced lovemaking is honed and reciprocal.

      And she's lived long enough to know how to please a man in ways her daughter could never dream of. (Young men, you have something to look forward to!)

  • Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off that you are a jerk if you're acting like one. A young woman will say nothing, fearing that you might think worse of her. An older woman doesn't give a damn.

    “If the Lord made anything better than a woman, He kept it for Himself.” — Jerry Lee Lewis


  • An older, single woman usually has had her fill of "meaningful relationships" and "long-term commitments." Can't relate? Can't commit? She could care less. The last thing she needs in her life is another whiny, dependent lover!

  • Older women are sublime. They seldom contemplate having a shouting match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive dinner. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

  • Most older women cook well. They care about cleanliness. They're generous with praise, often undeserved.

  • An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A young woman often snarls with distrust when "her guy" is with other women. Older women couldn't care less.

  • Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to an older woman. Like your mother, they always know.

Yes, we geezers praise older women for a multitude of reasons. These are but a few.

Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal.

For every stunning, smart, well-coifed babe of 75 there's a bald, paunchy relic with his yellow pants belted at his armpits making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize for my fellow geezers. That men are genetically inferior is no secret. Count your blessings that we die off at a far younger age, leaving you the best part of your lives to enjoy and appreciate the exquisite woman you've become. Without the distraction of some demanding old fart clinging and whining his way into your serenity.

© Copyright 2000 - 2006—Frank Kaiser


EDITOR'S NOTE: ON APRIL 2, 2003, I RECEIVED A PHONE CALL FROM ANDY ROONEY OF "60 MINUTES." HE TOO HAS BEEN BOMBARDED BY E-MAIL CONTAINING THE ABOVE COLUMN SIGNED BY "ANDY ROONEY."
HE TOLD ME THAT HE HAD NO IDEA HOW THIS STARTED, THAT HE IS NOT THE AUTHOR OF THIS COLUMN, THAT HE WAS HOPING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF IT.

See the Baltimore Sun's Susan Reimer's funny column about this column.

Also see http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/rooney2.asp



Of course, a celebrated encomium about older women was penned by a famous American statesman over 250 years earlier, when Benjamin Franklin wrote the piece known to us as "Old Mistresses' Apologue": June 25, 1745

My dear Friend,

I know of no Medicine fit to diminish the violent natural Inclinations you mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is the proper Remedy. It is the most natural State of Man, and therefore the State in which you are most likely to find solid Happiness. Your Reasons against entring into it at present, appear to me not well-founded. The circumstantial Advantages you have in View by postponing it, are not only uncertain, but they are small in comparison with that of the Thing itself, the being married and settled. It is the Man and Woman united that make the compleat human Being. Separate, she wants his Force of Body and Strength of Reason; he, her Softness, Sensibility and acute Discernment. Together they are more likely to succeed in the World. A single Man has not nearly the Value he would have in that State of Union. He is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd Half of a Pair of Scissars. If you get a prudent healthy Wife, your Industry in your Profession, with her good Economy, will be a Fortune sufficient.

But if you will not take this Counsel, and persist in thinking a Commerce with the Sex inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice, that in all your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones. You call this a Paradox, and demand my Reasons. They are these:

  1. Because as they have more Knowledge of the World and their Minds are better stor'd with Observations, their Conversation is more improving and more lastingly agreable.

  2. Because when Women cease to be handsome, they study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Men, they supply the Diminution of Beauty by an Augmentation of Utility. They learn to do a 1000 Services small and great, and are the most tender and useful of all Friends when you are sick. Thus they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such a thing to be found as an old Woman who is not a good Woman.

  3. Because there is no hazard of Children, which irregularly produc'd may be attended with much Inconvenience.

  4. Because thro' more Experience, they are more prudent and discreet in conducting an Intrigue to prevent Suspicion. The Commerce with them is therefore safer with regard to your Reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be rather inclin'd to excuse an old Woman who would kindly take care of a young Man, form his Manners by her good Counsels, and prevent his ruining his Health and Fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.

  5. Because in every Animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

  6. Because the Sin is less. The debauching a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her for Life unhappy.

  7. Because the Compunction is less. The having made a young Girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflections; none of which can attend the making an old Woman happy.

  8. and Lastly They are so grateful!!

Thus much for my Paradox. But still I advise you to marry directly; being sincerely

Your affectionate Friend. B. Franklin
















The original piece written by Frank Kaiser

About how the piece got attributed to Andy Rooney on Snopes.com

A Baltimore Sun article on Andy Rooney's take of all of this

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

HUMOR: Another Satisfied Customer!

In cleaning up my emails, I found this from The Sassy Witch that is rather appropriate for Halloween. :) - OlderMusicGeek

Dear Tide Company:

I am writing to say what an excellent product you have!

I've used Tide throughout my married life; my Mom always told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties, I find it even better!

In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was.

One thing led to another, and somehow I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse.

I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't come out. After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative; and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!

In fact, the stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative, and then my attorney called and said that I would no longer beconsidered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband.

What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having such a great product.

Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

SCIENCE: Study Warns of Spreading 'Superbug'

Another article I got on my netvibes.com homepage. This is from The L.A. Times. - OlderMusicGeek

Antibiotic-resistant bacterium that causes severe infections has migrated from hospitals and now kills more Americans than AIDS.
By Thomas H. Maugh II, Los Angeles Times Staff Writer
October 17, 2007

The number of severe infections by a "superbug," known as methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus, isat least twice as high as researchers previously believed, and the bacterium now kills more Americans than AIDS, researchers reported today.

The antibiotic-resistant infections, commonly called MRSA, were once confined to a few hospitals, but a new study by the national Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that in 2005 they made an estimated 94,000 Americans seriously ill and killed almost 19,000, compared with 17,000 who died of AIDS.

The infections have been a growing concern, particularly over the last decade, as they have spread outside hospitals, popping up in prisons, athletic fields and locker rooms.

The study reported that nearly 14% of new antibiotic-resistant staph infections are not linked to hospitals or other medical facilities, indicating that the disease has become ingrained in parts of the wider community.

The finding, reported in the Journal of the American Medical Assn., is the latest evidence of a widespread pattern of increasing drug resistance among a variety of infectious agents, including multi-drug resistant tuberculosis, antibiotic-resistant Clostridium difficile and other once-innocuous organisms.

Most forms of the staph bacterium are easily killed with common antibiotics, such as amoxicillin. But beginning in 1968, researchers began to see variants that required treatment with stronger antibiotics.

Experts attribute the emergence of the superbugs to indiscriminate use of antibiotics, the failure of patients to complete their antibiotic regimens and the use of antibiotics in animal feed. In each case, incomplete eradication of the bacteria leads to mutations that have increased resistance to the drugs.

Confined to the surface of the skin, the bacteria do minimal damage. But in hospitals, nursing homes and dialysis centers, they can hitch a ride inside the body on needles and other invasive devices, spreading through the bloodstream and causing severe illness.

In the same fashion, they can be spread by tattooing and drug use in prisons and by cuts and abrasions on the athletic field.

Infection rates were highest among those older than 65, and African Americans were twice as likely as whites to suffer an infection. In both groups, Klevens said, the higher rates were most likely due to a higher incidence of chronic diseases, which both weaken patients and send them more often to the hospital, where they come in contact with the bacterium.

For infants younger than 1, the rate was four times as high in blacks as in whites.

Healthcare advocates argue that hospitals need to improve hygiene. Some studies, for example, show that hospital workers wash their hands only about half as often as guidelines recommend.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Identity Crisis! Oh My God! I'm Not a Nerd or a Geek!

I just don't know how to deal with this. But I've taken various tests on nerdy or geeky I am. Yahoo, in fact, recently listed a bunch. And I don't come up very high!

Now obviously, most people would come away with this noise with great rejoice.
But I was a big social reject in high school. And it took me a while to come to terms with who I was and with what I thought was my nerdity. I decided I didn't care what people think - I wanted to read comicbooks and science fiction and listen to punk rock and new wave (which was radical in the midwest in the early 80s!).

I even went to my high school class's 5th reunion just to come to terms with my supposed nerdity.

Now I find I'm not even a nerd! I'm just some weird social reject of an undefined nature. I don't know - maybe I dealt with my nerdity too well.

But now I don't know what I am.

If you have any ideas out there, I love to hear it. What the heck am I? Certainly not a yuppie! What am I?! WHAT AM I?!?! WHAT - FOR GOD'S SAKE - AM I?!?!?!


Your Geek Profile:
Academic Geekiness: High
Music Geekiness: High
Fashion Geekiness: Moderate
Geekiness in Love: Low
Movie Geekiness: Low
SciFi Geekiness: Low
Gamer Geekiness: None
General Geekiness: None
Internet Geekiness: None

Are you a nerd or a geek? - You are a partial nerd! You do slightly nerdy things, but you don't go too far with it. But sometimes, you just need to wear a bow tie that was picked out by your mother and buy some Pokemon cards!

Geek

You scored 75 variable 1!You're okay. You're my type of person. We could talk.
By the way, this tag is from Badali Jewelry. They were kind enough to give me permission to use their tags.
Link: The Well-Rounded Geek Test written by ceruleanl on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test


I am nerdier than 20% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!Your nerdiness is: Not nerdy, but definitely not hip

Nerd Purity Test - I'm only 24% Nerd on this test and have my Weirdness Factor is only 16%. The average for most people is 26.2% Nerd.

Geek Purity Test - I'm only 14.7% Geek on this test and my Weirdness Factor is only 10%! The average is 19.9% Geek.

Some interesting questions though...
Is your desk a mess?
Do you have empty soda cans all around you?
Do you stay up into the wee hours of the morning?
Is your room messier before an earthquake?
Do you shower less than once a week?
-- twice a week?
-- every other day?
-- every day?
-- multiple times a day?
Do you change your underwear less than once a week?
-- less than twice?
-- every other day?
-- every day?
Do you comb your hair?
Do you change your sheets less than once a month?
-- less than twice?
-- every week?
Have you worn one pair of clothes all week?
-- month?
-- year!?
Have you put on deodorant less than once in the past month?
-- less than twice?
-- less than every week?
-- less than every day?
Do you eat your boogers?
Do you hawk loogies?
Do you blow 'snot-rockets'?
Do you adjust yourself in public?
Do you try to make farts really loud?
Have you ever lit a fart in the intent to make a flame thrower?
-- did it work?
Do you piss all over toilet seats in public places?
-- at home?
Do you not flush the toilet when you use it?
Does your sink have crusty plates and dishes in it?
-- are they older than a week old?
Do you leave the floss in the sink when your done?
Do you wipe your boogers on your clothes?
Do you want to get married?
Do you make rude and disgusting noises in bed for your own enjoyment?
Do you read literature while on the throne?

The Nerdity Test - My Nerdity Quotient is 11.6%. The average is 32.4. That makes me a mere Nerd-In-Training. Not even a Nerd Wannabe.

0 - 20.99Nerd-in-Training
21 - 35.99Nerd-wannabe
36 - 50.99Closet nerd
51 - 60.99Your social life needs some serious help
61 - 70.99YOU need some serious help
71 - 80.99Your best friend is a microchip
81 - 90.99"Revenge of the Nerds" poster-child
91 - 99.99Move over, Einstein
100Hail, O Nerd Master, virgin sliderules I sacrifice unto you

It also has some interesting questions...
Have you ever read an encyclopedia entry that you weren't researching?
Have you ever wanted to know something for no apparent reason?
Have you ever been laughed at for wanting to know something?
Can you program the time on a VCR?
Has anyone ever asked you to program their VCR time for them?
Can you whistle, hum, sing or snap the theme songs to...
...Gilligan's Island?
...Flintstones?
...The Brady Bunch?
...The Jetson's?
...The Addam's Family?
...I Dream of Jeannie?
Have you ever seen any of the "Revenge of The Nerd" movies more than once?
Have you seen all of the Star Wars movies?
...in one 24 hour period?
Do you refer to the various "Treks" as "TOS" (The Original Series), "TNG" (The Next Generation) and "DS9" (Deep Space 9) or similar?
Have you ever argued with someone over which "Trek" is better?
Have you ever argued over who was a better commander of the Enterprise?
Do you have acne?
Do you have greasy hair?
...without realizing it?
Have you ever worn a button-down shirt and left the tails hanging out?
Have you ever eaten pizza cold?
...do you like it that way?
...because you're too lazy to reheat it?
Do you talk to yourself?
...when other people are around?
...do they talk back?
...do they seem to be more/less intelligent than you?
Mark this true if you did NOT go to your senior prom.
Have you ever contemplated the meaning of life/existence of God?
...while not drunk?
...while alone?
Have you ever found a grammatical error in a published book?
Have you ever given an inanimate object a name?
Was the object something electronic or mechanical?
Did the object also have a "personality"?

The Innergeek Geek Test - 20.51282% (which qualifies me as a geek, but not a strong one)
+ Geekish Tendencies......................≥09%
++ Geek.............................................≥15%
+++ Total Geek................................≥25%
++++ Major Geek............................≥35%
+++++ Super Geek..........................≥45%
++++++ Extreme Geek..................≥55%
+++++++ Geek God........................≥65%
+++++++! Dysfunctional Geek......≥75%

The Compleat Geek Test - I was pretty much tied between normal and mostly normal - with only one answer in the geek category!

Mostly A's: You're normal. Boring Boring Boring. You're the sort of person who'll just fritter their way thru life enjoying themselves and having a good time. Shame on you!

Mostly B's: You're mostly normal. Nothing a little ECT can't clear away in any case. You almost make it into the "Mostly A's" above.

Mostly C's: Geek Alert! Break out the pocket protector! With a set of horn rims and a pocket calculator, you're ready for Revenge Part #72. You can be the person that gets beat up all the time.

Mostly D's: So you're a socipath; But that doesn't mean you're a bad person! Just keep taking the Lithium and everything'll be fine.

The Unofficial 250 Question Purdue University Nerdity Examination
Computer Experience: 14%
Math Experience - wait, I'm sorry, Mathematical Experience - 18%
Science Experience - 16%
Nerd Culture (did a little better here) - 36%
Nerd Sex (not saying what I answered yes to!) - 18%
Average - 20%

God, I'm not a real nerd. I just live the Nerd Culture!

Some questions from the test -
24) Have you ever defeated a computer virus (cleaned out your system with no data loss and little loss of time)?
25) Do you collect viruses?
26) Have you ever infected another computer with a virus intentionally?
27) Have you ever written a computer virus?
28) Was it for profit?
29) Have you ever been AT A LOSS for storage space on your hard drive?
43) Have you ever thrown out an algorithm because it took more time than another algorithm?
44) Have you ever thrown out an algorithm because it used more memory than another algorithm?
45) Have you ever worried about dirty electricity (yes this is a legitimate question; we have this problem in Chicago.)
72) Can you count to more than 1000 on two hands?
76) Can you calculate sales tax in your head?
77) Do you know how to add the numbers 1, 2, 3, ... 100 in less than one minute using just a paper and pencil?
86) Do you know the first seven Prime Numbers?
105) Did you ever make illegal substances (explosives, drugs, etc.) with a chemistry set?
143) Have you ever had an experiment catch fire or explode on you?
149) Have you ever been the target of a political group because of your experiments (i.e.- Operation Rescue, Animal Liberation Front, Mad Mothers Against Socially Unacceptable Physicists, etc.)
152) Have you ever been told to leave a party for reasons other than obnoxious behavior?
156) Have you ever read "The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy"?
157) Have you read the entire trilogy (all five books)?
158) Have you ever seen an episode of Star Trek?
159) Dr. Who?
160) Star Trek: The Next Generation?
161) Blake's Seven?
162) Deep Space Nine?
163) Kung Fu: The Legend Continues?
191) Have you ever made a technical joke?
192) Did nobody get it?
199) Have people ever winced when they heard your major, field of study or occupation?
200) Have you ever taken a nerdity test?
205) Have you ever had sex with two or more nerds in a 24 hour period?
206) Have you ever had sex with a nerd to the point of orgasm?
207) Have you ever had sex with a nerd to the point of mutual orgasm?
208) Have you ever had sex with the same nerd more than once in a 24 hour period or had one session of sex which lasted for three hours or three orgasms, whichever came first?
210) Have you ever had a steady relationship with more than one nerd at a time, such that neither knew (or so you believed)?
216) Have you ever worn any of the items in glasses, dress slacks, or a shirt with equations, a picture of a scientist, mathematician or computer scientist on the front in order to seduce someone?
217) Have you ever tried to pick someone up by reciting Pi?
234) Have you ever gotten turned on by a biology textbook?
235) Have you ever turned someone else on by reading them sections from a biology textbook?
240) Have you ever made love in a chemistry lab?
241) a physics lab?
242) a biology lab?
243) a computer lab?
244) Have you ever picked someone up in one of the labs mentioned in 240-3 while class was in session?
245) Have you ever petted or made out with someone in one of the labs mentioned in 240-3 while class was in session?
247) Did you do any of 240-6 and still get your work done in time?
250) Have you ever offered to help someone out in math, science or computer science in order to pick them up?

You know - after re-reading some of these questions, I think that losing my identity as a nerd might be a pretty good thing!

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