MY LIFE: Adding some woo hoo to a co-workers life

Me: "You know what tomorrow is?"

Co-worker I've teased about being grumpy: "No."

Supervisor: "What's tomorrow?"

Me: "It's Friday! Woo hoo!"

Co-worker: (deadpan to supervisor) "The woo hoo's the important part."

MY LIFE: Trivia Games Of The Mind

I don't know about you, but as I get older, I find my mind playing more and more trivia games with me. And, of course, rude mind that it is – and my mind can be very rude! - it doesn't even ask me if I want to play.

So I was sitting there innocently at work doing quality control on data entry – yes, I know, exciting work. Which is why I have to have my music with me. If I forget my iPod, I take a 9 o'clock lunch to go get it! But that really has nothing to do with our story. Just an exciting tidbit of my exciting life I was throwing at you. I swear, if I wasn't getting a sex change, I'd be one of the most boring people on this planet!

Anyway! I'm at work listening to music, when I was trying to remember some of the punk rock and alternative rock I had on my old hard drive before it died. And for some reason, I remember this song “Last Nite”. I can kind of remember how it goes and some of the lyrics, but I can't remember the name of the band. I know they're The S-something.


Now normally, I would just google this, but our work has a really strict policy about internet usage. Almost any site having remotely to do with social networks is blocked. Even a local TV channel's site is blocked because we were picking up too many viruses from there. Of course, these rules don't stop me from using the internet, just careful about when I do use it.

And I wasn't ready to use it yet. I still had a couple of other resources.

And I turned to one of my cubicle mates. He was one of the trio of trivia experts in our department. I being another, and a data entry tech being the third. The third member of the trio wasn't a huge music fan. He liked well enough and could answer some general music trivia questions, but he wasn't one of the people you go to about music.

Now, my cubicle mate was into music quite a bit. Not as much as me of course, but more than almost everybody in the department. And as I said he was part of the trivia trio in our department.


So I tap his shoulder, he takes off his headphones, and I say, “I need help. I can't remember this name of a band. I know they had a song called “Last Nite” and it's spelled N-I-T-E. And their name starts with an S. They're The S-Something. They're a guitar-oriented alternative band from the 90s.” They're actually from the 00s, but anyway....

Then more information came to me. “And part of the lyrics was 'last nite she said'. And there's something about grandma doesn't know and UFOs don't know. And on their second album they sing something about the end having no end. And they've had 3 albums that I know of.”

“Oh, and I think their first album is called “Last Nite”.” It wasn't. If my mind is going to play trivia games with me, I wish it would play fair with accurate information.

My cubicle mate thought for a while. “Those lyrics sound familiar. Could you sing part of it?”

I smiled. “Um, I could, but you still probably wouldn't recognize it.”

He smiled back. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

Then he added, “Well, dang, now I want to know who it is.”


Fortunately, I still had another ace up my sleeve. We have a second music fanatic in our department. But don't worry, she's about 25 years younger than me, so there's little overlap between us.

In fact, a couple years back, I was tried to impress her, show her that I didn't just listen to music from my time, the late 70s to mid 80s. I rattled off a bunch of "new" bands i was listening to.

And she said, and I quote... and yes, I can quote her because I'll never forget what she said! “Oh, yeah, the 90s, that was good music. I listen to some of that stuff when I was a kid.”


So anyway, I went to her cube but she wasn't there. So I left a note. Fortunately for once, I thought ahead and let her know what it was about, so she wouldn't worry and wonder why she was being summoned to the quality control cubicle. Figured she'd be a bit annoyed worrying about why the q.c. people to see her and find out it's just to name a band.

Well, I couldn't wait any longer. I broke company rules – shhh! - and looked up the lyrics on the internet. The band's name came right up.

The other music fanatic showed up shortly after that. She was kind of laughing. She asked if we figured it out and said we had, but gave her the information I had anyway.

And right away she said, “The Strokes?”

“Yep. Where were you when we needed you?”

She just smiled and kind of shrugged. And I just kind of shrugged at my slowly deteriorating mind and its stupid trivia games.

MY LIFE: Apparently I Fit The Profile

This is from me, and NOT some reprinted material. - OlderMusicGeek

“What's with the hair?” asked a co-worker who I've nicknamed "The Mortal Enemy”. Apparently, a lot of what I do is some horrible affront to her. Honestly, I get hassled less by my ex-wife.

On this occasion, it looked like she had a problem with me tying back the hair that I'd been growing out. I explained that I prefer the hair behind me than in my face.

“Well, I have a pair of scissors at my desk.”

I commented on how I don't see her using them, and she went on about how she gives her hair to charity. For her I guess, that is the only good reason to grow your hair out.


I later grumbled one of my cubicle mates how the person with the longest hair was complaining about my hair.

She rolled her eyes in sympathy.

“Well, she thinks only certain kind of guys wear their hair long.”

I am a male-to-female transsexual, but I've just started transitioning and haven't come out at work. So I was curious if any of my co-workers had seen me in female mode.

“What kind of guys?”

“Well, you know...”

“Not really.” At least, I didn't know what she meant!

“Well, you know, just certain guys.”

“No, I don't know.”

My co-worker thought for a moment.

“Well, like guys who are really into music.”

I smiled. “Yeah, that doesn't describe me at me!”

She looked a little embarrassed and added, “And college professors.”

“Oh, well, I've never been compared to absent-minded professors!”

She rolled her eyes again, though not in sympathy this time, and went back to work.

I went back to work thinking about how my mortal enemy has it out for professorial music fans.

CULTURE/SOCIETY:OlderMusicGeek's Parent's Guide To Stress Relief

This is from, and is NOT some reprinted material. - OlderMusicGeek

At my work, we were given a form on how to deal with stress. I said as parents, some of us knew how to deal with stress. So with my help of a couple of my co-workers, I present OlderMusicGeek's Parent's Guide To Stress Relief.

If the other person is stressed -
- Get over it!
- Deal!
- Cope!
- Wah wah wah oh boo hoo hoo!
- Suck it up, nancy boy!
- You want something to cry about?!
- You know what will take your mind off that? housework!
- Well maybe if you didn't (fill in the blank), it never would have happened!
- If you would (fill in the blank) like i told you, that never would have happened!
- If you'd act more like (fill in the blank), you wouldn't have these problems!
- Maybe if you'd learn to act like a human being...?
- Maybe if you didn't act like a complete maniac...?

Or if you want take a more sympathetic route -
- You think that's bad, you should hear what happened to me when i was your age!

If you're the one who's stressed -
- You know it looks like a good day to play outside. I don't care if the wind chill is negative, bundle up!
- You haven't played with so-and-so in a long time.
- I'll get to that soon as I'm down with this important work on the computer. I don't care if it looks like such-and-such a game.
- This can't wait until my nap is over. So what? I sleep with the tv on!

CULTURE/SOCIETY: My Daughter as Prey (Don't Be Sick People!)

This is from me, not some reprinted article. - OlderMusicGeek

My daughter, a while back, was talking about how her and her classmates learned of the dog breed known as the shih tzu.

Of course, they had a blast with that. Apparently, making the usual jokes of stepping in a shih tzu and what-not.

So I told my daughter, "It's a good thing that you guys didn't hear about the breed, fukka tu."

My daughter looks at me really shocked and surprised. "Is there really a breed like that?!"

Not being able to keep a straight face, I told her no and waved her off.


But this reminded me of a time when she was much younger. We were driving on the interstate and we saw some cows.

"Look, Daddy, cows!" shouted my daughter in excitement.

"Oh yeah, I see them," I answered in mock excitement.

"Are those real cows?"

"Oh, no. The real cows died years ago and have been replaced by robot cows."

With some confusion, my daughter went, "Ohhh."

But my then wife happened to be in the car and she called me on it. She might not have known that much about America, but she wasn't about to accept robot cows!

So I had to admit to my daughter that the cows were real.


When I told some co-workers about these two incidents, one of them said, "She's not your daughter! She's your prey!"