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Friday, January 30, 2009

CULTURE/SOCIETY: A Girl's Guide to Geek Guys

MizHelena directed this piece from Complete Evil. I edited it down. You can click here for the complete piece. - OlderMusicGeek

A Girl's Guide to Geek Guys
By Mikki Halpin and Victoria Maat

So, your crush on the bass player from Vibrating Sandbox has finally died a whimpering death and you're wondering where to go from here. All the sinister dudes are either dating a series of interchangeable high-school riot girls in baby doll dresses and an overdose of manic panic, or permanently shacked up with some bitter old lady who pays all the bills. Which will it be, a wifely prison or a humiliating one night stand? Into this void of potential mates comes a man you may not have considered before, a man of substance, quietude and stability, a cerebral creature with a culture all his own. In short, a geek.

Why Geek Dudes Rule
They are generally available.
Other women will tend not to steal them.
They can fix things.
Your parents will love them.
They're smart.

Where The Geek Dude Lurks
The best way to meet a geek dude is through the Internet. All geeks harbor a secret fantasy about meeting some girl in cyberspace, carrying on an e-mail romance in which he has the chance to combine an activity he is comfortable with, computing, with one he is very uncomfortable with, socializing. To many geek dudes, cyberdating is just an advanced form of some kind of video game, but they are frustrated by a lack of players. Their lack is your strength.

The Trek factor
If you're not up on your Star Trek, you can forget about getting or keeping a geek dude. The sexual politics of Star Trek are pretty blunt: the men run the technology and the ship, and the women are caretakers (a doctor and a counselor). Note the sexual tensions on the bridge of the Enterprise: the women, in skin tight uniforms, and with luxuriant, flowing hair. The men, often balding, and sporting some sort of permanently attached computer auxiliary.

This world metaphorizes the fantasies of the geek dude, who sees himself in the geeky - but - heroic male officers and who secretly desires a sexy, smart, Deanna or Bev to come along and deferentially accept him for who he is. If you are willing to accept that this is his starting point for reality, you are ready for a geek relationship.

Post-It Note
I thank Victoria for the above advice. I must say that when she read my draft of the piece, before writing her section, she asked her husband which one he thought she was more like, Deanna or Beverly. Howard, the devil, immediately replied that he had always thought Victoria was actually most like Ensign Ro Laren, a cute character with a slight authority problem who is always had trouble (this is fairly apt). This exchange is interesting for several reasons:

1.Howard had already thought about who she was most like.
2.He could summon up characters from seasons past with ease.
3.Victoria actually knew who he meant.
4.Folks, I think this marriage will last.

One Last Thing
Because they have been so abused and ignored by society, many geeks have gone underground. You may actually know some and just haven't noticed them. They often feel resentful, and misunderstood, and it is important to realize this as you grow closer to them. Don't ever try to force the issue, or make crazy demands that he choose between his computer and you. Remember, his computer has been there for him his whole life; you are a new interloper he hasn't quite grasped yet. Geek dudes thrive on mystery and love challenges and intellectual puzzles. Don't you consider yourself one? Wouldn't you like a little intellectual stimulation or your own? We thought so.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

HUMOR: You Know You're Drinking Too Much Coffee When.....

I got this from my brother, Harmonica23. - OlderMusicGeek

You Know You're Drinking Too Much Coffee When.....
.. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
.. You personally account for more than 1% of the Gross National Product of Brazil.
.. You have a bumper sticker that says: "Coffee drinkers are good in the sack."
.. You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
.. The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
.. You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.
.. You're so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas.
.. Mosquitoes that bite you can fly through glass.
.. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
.. You think skydiving is just too damned slow.
.. You answer the door before people knock.
.. You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
.. You can jump-start your car without cables.
.. Your urine stream bores a hole in the toilet.
.. You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
.. You stand in front of the microwave oven screaming, "Hurry UP!!!"
.. You lick your coffeepot clean.
.. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

HUMOR and POLITICS: Top 10 Perks Of The Obama Presidency…

This is from the Do Something Wonderful! blog. - OlderMusicGeek

  1. Canadians no longer minding being called Americans when traveling abroad…and no longer necessary to pretend you're Canadian while traveling abroad.
  2. Smartest guy in room now IS the President.
  3. Drug companies begin search for compound to relieve new health problem: people suffering from repeated, uncontrollable sighs of relief.
  4. Citizens find days passing by quickly in a giddy lightheaded state (“Obamaraderie”).
  5. Reporter-safe puppy. (Or, Barney's bites no longer make the news.)
  6. White House now Cheney-Free zone…except for his eighth cousin, Barack Obama.
  7. Having a president whose first language is English and has made a campaign promise to pronounce the word nuclear, nuclear.
  8. Color blind citizens not annoyed by claim “We're all color-blind now.”
  9. Warring African nations declare a "ceasefire minute" to celebrate.
  10. Excuse that lipstick on collar is from “Some teary-eyed Obama supporter in line at Grocery store” accepted at face value by spouse.

ON ANOTHER BLOG: "PERSONALITY: Another Getting To Know You Thingy" on OlderMusicGeek's Stupid Tests And Quizzes (just click here)

Thursday, January 15, 2009

CULTURE/SOCIETY: Go The Speed Limit Or With The Flow?

I always feel like speed limits are put there for a reason. Sometimes, the choice isn't always the best, but I've never considered speeding as civil disobediance. So I found this piece from NPR helpful. - OlderMusicGeek

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What is this?

The Ethicist
by Randy Cohen

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All Things Considered, August 21, 2005 · In an age of road rage, does driving the speed limit actually put more people at risk than keeping up with the flow? Host John Ydstie parses this question with The New York Times' Randy Cohen and a concerned listener/driver.



(Turns out the guys from Car Talk think you should go with the flow. - OMGeek)

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

HUMOR: Sending A Message

A joke sent to me long ago by The Sassy Witch. - OlderMusicGeek

A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub...

She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately.
She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers.
As he did, she gently caressed his full beard.
"Are you the manager?" she asked, softly stroking his face with both hands.
"Actually, no," he replied.
"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she said, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.
"I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Yes. I need for you to give him a message," she continued, running her forefinger across the bartender's lip and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
"What should I tell him?" the bartender managed to say.
"Tell him," she whispered,

"There's no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."

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